You have to accentuate the positive…

And eliminate the negatives…

I know this is a very cliché term but I can not stress how important this is as a writer. It doesn’t mean that I am telling to you not take advice. On the contrary… the way we become better writers is by sharing and receiving critiques from friends, family and strangers on twitter.

However, there is a huge difference between advice given to you because some one cares enough to critique your work, and someone who is just plain negative about anything that isn’t theirs… or doesn’t meet their fancy.

There will inevitably be negative things that people will say about your story, writing style, POV choice, etc… unless they give you a solid reason as to why they are being negative… ignore them. Move on to the positives.

On this side of the coin, we have peer critiques. When I give  a peer critique, I try REALLY hard to follow the following outline when I comment.

Start with the positive aspects, when you can find them. If you can’t then start off with another positive thing about the person, their point of view, their way of life… something positive. Because criticism is best received with a smile. If you jump right into a critique with the negative, you loose listening points. Guaranteed. Anything else you say will fall on deaf ears. When you start with a positive statement, you have a platform, they want to hear what you have to say. Only after you have accomplished this should you go into what you saw and suggest. If what you are reading begs to be torn apart, then maybe you aren’t the right person to be reading it.

Not every story is for everyone. Which is why critique partners are hard to find and keep… you have to trust your partners judgement and know they will be honest but use grace when they point out the faults.

Finally, when you are ready to close your email, identify again things you loved about the MS/WIP. Not only will is sooth any hurt feelings but it will also make the other things you say fall squarely into the heart. Because the person on the other end of the email is a person and has feelings. And while yes, it’s a competitive game out there, you should never tear someone apart just because you disagree with their ideas.

On the flip side of the coin… what do you do with someone who is negative with everything that comes out of their lips/fingers? Ignore them and find a new partner… Hahaha!

Well okay, you can’t do that. Usually. But you can realize that they need a “happy” pill if it continues and maybe your work isnt a good fit for them.

However, it is important that you surround yourself with positive influences and people who aren’t always bringing others down. Even if you are a writer who has a long way to go before publication, no one should be saying disparaging things about your work or even you! You only have so much time in this life, don’t waste it on negative people who bring you down just because they can.

Find someone who has a great outlook on writing AND life… because out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth will speak.

Which also mean… watch what you say, specially on social networking sites. When people come to represent you and check you out, they can see everything you do on the internet with a cute little tool called Google. Maybe you’ve heard of it… Haha!

Google has come a long way from the spider it was… to the massive seek and find it is now! I can post this and in less then two hours come up on a search engine (at least I could with Blogger, not sure about WordPress). Which means EVERYTHING you say is indexed and can be used against you in life.

Does that mean you should never say anything negative? No… it just means try to find the good in even the crappy stuff. It means accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative.

So, what message are you sending to your fans? Your perspective agent?